Here's a message I wrote back in August to fill you in…
"…We were finally putting long awaited plans into motion and really excited about the current path. But as timing would have it (continuing the most consistent lesson of this stage in life) God had other plans.
A seemingly once-in-a-lifetime opportunity came up.
A dream come true yet a giant risk.
As our contractor affirmed, "God’s put this opportunity in front of you at this time for a reason, and you need to listen to your gut and see it through."
So our plans changed, we followed the promptings, we did our research, we listened to our gut, and we chased a dream. That decision alone felt monumental.
And good grief, we actually got it!
We celebrated what we never thought could be and we imagined the future for our young family.
And then…we lost it, through no fault of our own.
And while everyone is safe and healthy and in hindsight this will be a very small first-world problem, it uprooted us, literally and figuratively speaking. The shock and confusion and devastation of getting what you never thought possible and then getting it ripped away just a few weeks later felt all too familiar.
We did everything we could to get it back and it simply didn’t work. For whatever reason it wasn't meant to happen, yet we knew our old plan was also no longer an option. Now what do we do, where do we go?
As a new parent I'm learning that the nesting instincts do not end with pregnancy. There is always a strong desire to be settled and create a safe space for your kids to thrive. While the details aren't necessary, the real estate wringer isn’t always conducive to this goal.
Everything will be fine and work out how it should but right now we're frustrated, we’re anxious, feeling duped and a little foolish too. Within just a few weeks we went from being perfectly content to following a prompting towards a dream, to the high of it coming to fruition, to the low of being let down and now…uncertainty. You following!? If this feels like an annoying game of shoots and ladders, you're right.
Thankfully God is more than capable of handling my questions.
All we could do was take a somewhat blind step forward, which then took us a few steps backwards. Another step forward and here we are still waiting to see how everything will pan out.
I’ve been non-committal about a launch date for the fall collection. Products are arriving at my door and being created with my own hands with you in mind. But every time things seem certain and I pick a date, something changes. So we keep waiting and I keep postponing, and now I'm not sure this launch is going to happen this year at all.
Is this you too? Are you wading through the dark?
This experience is now so typical to 2020 and unfortunately it's not over yet. The uncertainty I imagine all parents with school-aged children are facing as you send your kids back to school, or as you yourself return to your offices, or try navigate this wild political and social climate. Many of you are battling big challenges. Health, finances, heartbreak, waiting - some new to the season, some you’ve been walking through for what feels like an eternity. All of the events and unrest this year has psychologists saying we’re all walking through trauma and a state of constant underlying anxiety, not to mention your own individual challenges.
The path ahead feels like a swampy marsh amidst dense fog. We have to walk through it but I can only see the little rock I’m standing on. After a few moments another rock appears just a step ahead. Ah, a piece of certainty! So I take that step, take a deep breath in the relief of progress and then hold it again, waiting to see what happens next.
1 Mississippi…2 Mississippi…we’re running out of air here!
We are clueless as to what we will encounter or how this will end. We can't see a thing. We just have to take that next step and trust another one will appear after that.
In April I sent you all a message saying, "In this life we are no stranger to waiting, uncertainty, and disappointment. This is the Saturday of our story…
But friends, Sunday is coming."
I didn't realize how many times I'd be rereading my own words. If there’s anything that 2020 has been drilling into my head, it’s that I am not in control and His plans and His timing is always greater.
So, we're moving! We sold (fingers crossed) our 100 year old little cottage home on the lake that's served us well for the past 5 years and we no longer have a home of our own to move into, with the exception of our parents basements (yes, they're saints).
If you too find yourself in a messy middle, another Saturday season, holding your breath through the fog, join me. You can hold my hand if you want ;) We'll acknowledge the junk and also count the good because there's always a hundred reasons why we're so stinkin' blessed.
Together we’ll seek out the next step in front of us, stepping boldly in faith and trusting His guidance towards a future that’s immeasurably more than we can imagine."
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Thankfully the fog cleared to allow for this launch and more certainty appears each week.
The irony of launching the Homebody Collection while our home was literally up for grabs is not lost on me. As we wait to secure a new home and pack up to move in with family, I know God has a sense of humor. While it still feels like the messy middle of a Saturday there is still so much to be thankful for. Hold on to the excitement that Sunday's coming.
Until then I'm so glad we can walk through the fog together.
Please let me know if I can send any prayers your way.